oh i found him on list

not that it matters just fyi

No, he's not legit As for Google, that isn't surprising. Unless something unusual or noteworthy has happened, why would you find him on Google? Not everyone has content on Google. I've looked up my own name and it doesn't come up, but my brother's does - however, it's for a man twice his age who is in prison for murder in another state. However, if he's already lying about where and when he went to school, which is a mundane bit of information, then you can trust nothing he says. If he lies about the little things, he'll lie about the big things. Do you know where he lives? An address? If so, that's easy enough to check and will give you a better idea of what's going on.

well i know this Hes a widower and last night he googled my name and my husbands obituary came up and my moms but nothing on him

not everyone is on classmates dot com just because you graduate from a certain school and year doesnt mean that you can be found on classmates.com... if you want to find out if he is legit, get to know him. Then meet his friends and family... there is no way to tell if he is legit on the net... and I think you may be moving a bit too fast and maybe a bit nieve... you CAN serial date, most guys dont care if you've only been on a few dates. Dont be so serious about finding and staying (picking) one person. Date around and get back out there. Dont wear your heart on your sleeve cuz some guy can fake the nice guy act and rip your heart out after he gets what he wants.Just bby you saying that there are so many nice guys out there makes me believe that you dont really know what you are looking at...

try this Is a great place. You may pay a little for the LEVEL of information you want, but the check is very thorough. For gals dating, especially on line, I recommend it x%. Many people in jails have access to the internet, so you never know how much prep work they have done before their release. Let your common sense do the research before your heart gets involved. Good luck. Stay safe

First date - candy store I would say that many more than just those who want access to the candy store on the first date have trouble with this. I have been running into those who think that they can be patient for a month or two, but eventually that candy store better be open. Since I am open up front, letting them know that I am not available for casual sexual encounters, I don't go out much. In fact, one highly educated individual (has a Ph.D. in engineering with a BA in Journalism) proceeded to tell me recently that he could not accept a relationship with a sexually capable woman that would not involve intimacy and that was "the gospel truth." I responded that I was living the gospel truth and that was why I would not be practicing intimacy with someone I was not wed to. It sure makes it hard to find someone to open the heart to. When will they figure out that the keys to the candy store is on the same keychain as the keys to the heart?

Thank you

thanks so much i will check it out

classmates.com only tells you about paying members who went to that school. most people don't register, and there is almost nothing to verify someone who does register, For an easy Background check, ask for a landline telephone number, and do a reverse look up (x.com) to see who it is registered to. There are more complete services available. Also, if you do meet, first date should be coffee/lunch/dinner in a very public area, and no home visits.

try zaba.com

Beware, read the Donna Jou case ... x year old meets guy on 's List. Talk for a month. He then picks her up on his motorcycle. She's then gone missing and is missing since June. He turns out to be a convicted sex offender. But then, there was a screw loose on her side. Doesn't make sense to hop on someone's motorcycle when you haven't really met them but online. Makes more common sense to meet at a coffee house, I'd say. Just cross your fingers, a nut-case doesn't cross your path in the short years we have on this earth. Damn!!! I just thought of something. This "God" of ours makes a universe that is billions if not trillions years old and gives us but a mere x years to live, if that. Damn !!!

so you all know I made my phone and address non-published when i started dating so no one can find my home, hopefully

Need Some Advice there a few sites that can help identify him here's one that I think can do it free. just go to allguyscheat.com

Hmm Im taking the proper precautions, didnt reveal my real name until last night, neither did he. Maybe its the female intuition thing or the saying if its too good to be true it probably is. I still feel like somethings not right

I'd say follow your gut We have instincts for a reason. The times I've ignored mine is times that bad things happened.

Agree With Post Above You don't know if he's legit and will not if you've not met him. Talking ln the net so much is a bad idea and a fantasy. If you think he's worth seeing, just set up to meet at a safe place and get to know him. If you think he's worth seeing again, ask him if that's his real name and why he doesn;'t show up anywhere. If a man has a problem with a woman checking up on him, he's no good. If he gave you s fake name, I'd be wary, but still OK with it. Be CAREFUL. Do not gave any specific information about you where someone can find you until you now his and feel OK with him. If you start to spend time with him and like him, he'd better feel very up fron with you knowing where he lives, works, came from etc., or big red flag. At this point, showing up on a search is pointless. Meet him, and then see what you want to do. And from someone who has done a lot of internet dating, stop talking on the net withoutn meeting. It can be "fun," but it's not realistic and not likely to take you anywhere healthy if you've not met. There are definately a lot of good men on cl, but a lot of weird, scary ones. I ran into one who was a really creepy, aggressive abuser who had "attacked" a lot of women in cl, virtually I mean. You don't want to let someone liek this get contact info. on you.

Its Time I think its time we meet in person in a safe place. I hope he is who he says he is because I am crazy about him. We have talked about many things the past few weeks, things that normally take months to learn. Has anyone met their SO online?

I've met a lot of guys I thought the same about But they were not the same in person! It's worth a try, I just think don't go too long talking and revealing things without meeting him. A few emails and one phone conversation, if I'm interested then it's time for coffee - that's what I've determined from past experience. Don't spend all your time on him as you haven't even met him. Look around, go out with several guys before you get attached to any of them.

Inspiring Glad to hear you met someone online and its working out. Thanks

Mine also It's nearly a decade, now. Never would've met if it hadn't been for the net. x miles away. I will say this: it never has a chance to get boring in person! But any future relationship will have to be MUCH closer to home. LD ain't for sissies.

Is he ligit? Have the local police/shriff department run a records search. You can't be too careful. Also try one of the google or people searches.

determining legitimacy x) meet all the men in person and take a little time to get to know them in person. see if the behavior matches up to the words. pay attention to inconsistencies and warning signs in the first few dates. if a guy says something negative about himself early on, believe him, and decide right then whether that trait is a dealbreaker or not. x) don't rush to commit to anyone just yet. the guys who will rush you are probably the controlling, jealous ones you don't want. x) registration on classmates.com is voluntary, not automatic. the schools don't put the names and contact info there. so not seeing him listed means nothing. x) you're in rebound mode. anyone who treats you better than the ex is going to look good, maybe better than he deserves. I'm not going to tell you not to date--I'm sure you're enjoying your newfound freedom--but avoid getting serious and exclusive with anyone for six months at least. hope this helps!

Sphynx - right on! And I'd like to add one more, based on experience: x) Don't spend too much time initially talking either online or on the phone - and don't believe everything you hear. It's easy to build such a solid mental image from their protrayal of themselves that even when faced with the real deal, you're blinded by what you've been led to believe. Some men smell loneliness in a woman like sharks smell blood, and have about the same reaction. They will tell you what you want to hear, in the hopes of getting past your defenses. Mind you, I'm not saying ALL men are like this, but there is a large quantity of that type online, and you need to be careful. Go with your gut, trust your instincts and don't make excuses for things he does that bother you. And for God's sake, don't let him convince you that you have some kind of problem for expecting better behavior from them. Good Luck!

Thanks Sphynx!

thank you been there, done that when I was x--parts x and x at least. using the internet to check on people was not so common then, and I never had a taste for jealous guys. very glad to share the knowledge to help prevent some costly mistakes!

Hang on... Don't like serial daters...? If someone's pressuring you into a relationship, already, you're dating the wrong people.

No NO NO Im just saying that when you date a few men at the same time, they start demanding sex if you start having sex then they want to "claim you" its just a male thing

Hi Sym! Nice to have you back!! Have you tried to myspace him? If you met on CL then he probably has a myspace too.