What in the world!?! So I have accepted that there is nothing I can do about my wife leaving, I told her to take what she wanted and she literally emptied the house. Lucky for us we don't have any children, but she was still raising hell about dividing our assets. I ed her lawyer and told her that she could have EVERYTHING. everything thing I own, including our pets, car, and small business. She turned down the offer because they want to go after the townhouse we lived in that my dad owns. anyways.... I cad to her on this because there was no way she was going to get something that isn't ours, and there is is no way that she was going to get a better deal than everything! Turns out her lawyer told her that I was being uncooperative, and that I wanted everything. Is that legal? if I hadn't ed my X, we would both still be mad. instead we can get this over with. now instead of waiting and going to mediation and paying a lot more money to lawyers, we can just agree, she isn't even interested in the small business. marriages break down because of communication problems, and it looks to me like some lawyers are trying to make full advantage of this, not for their clients, but for their own pocketbooks. it really chaps my hide.

The problem isn't the lawyers The problem is you two should have sat down and hashed it all out BEFORE you went to an attorney. Then you could have it all drawn up and not pay for a darn lawyer every time he picks up a phone to rely what each of you said either in person or thru YOUR lawyer. I understand that some people can't even talk anymore..their marriage breakdown is that bad. Well, actually I don't really understand how you can love someone, be married, possibly have children and grow to hate each other..but that is neither here or there. I certainly see it all the time here on these boards. Gus, you two should sit down,draw it all up, not pay for a mediation,,have your own..have each attorney approved it and done. I did it for x dollars. Lawyers will bleed you dry and I wish people would understand that every dime they get is a dime you DON"T get.

Couldn't have said it better

Sometimes people can't hash it out due to several reasons. x. Namely, one is hurt and so bent on taking and being so vindictive and feel that have to hurt their exspouse no matter the costs, including the . x. Sometimes people are just gold-diggers. I'm lucky. My ex and I divorced without problems. We sat down, talked and talked some more. We have two , grown and before we relayed that we were divorcing, we knew for x months and kept it private. We had decisions in place. One thing that me and my ex vowed we never do allow someone to come into our lives and destroy our relationship. Our have accepted it and we all get along great. We agreed that we are two good people who don't belong. My exs last gf did bash me pretty bad but when my ex got wind of it, he dumped her quickly. I had never met or did anything to the woman but for some reason I was the bitch!! Duh! My ex and I get along because we made that choice to be grown up and mature about the whole situation. Even when his last ex gf bashed me, I never reciprocated. I just laughed, which I heard made her more angry, but that's her issue, not mine. Both parties have to agree to agree. Communication is the key but it has to go for both. Won't work if only one is communicating.

it takes x people to hash it out. Of course I wanted to sit down and hash it out, I was willing to give her everything. I didn't want the divorce, I wanted to at least try counseling, and I wanted to just settle everything without lawyers after she decided she wanted out. in a one sided divorce, you can't make the other side do things the easy way. and I know there is going to be some wise guy out there is going to try to tell me there isn't a such thing as a one sided divorce. But there is. without doing anything wrong, one person can decide they want to be single, and there is nothing you can do or say to make them stay. Free agency is a bitch. I still haven't hired an attorney, am I getting screwed? Yes, but I'll be able to sleep at night. All of our stuff only had meaning for the life we were building together. without her all of the stuff is just memories, great memories, of what I once had, and what walked out on me.

I disagree with the above post First of all, some people can't hash out an agreement when one of them has a "my way or the highway" attitude and tosses out their spouse like yesterday's trash. That is what happened in my case. Second, sometimes the problem IS the lawyers. At our first court-ordered mediation the plaintiff's lawyer told everyone in the room, "My client will not have to pay a dime for title to the marital residence." Once she heard that, there was no reasoning with her and it turned into the legal equivalent of WWI trench warfare. After more than x x/x years of this she finally accepted a compromise by which she got nearly x% of our assets (she had wanted about x%). Both of us lost all of our cash savings, and some stocks (being sold), to pay the attorney and associated court fees. These days I am trying very hard to have a positive outlook on life and not think about this stuff any more.

Can't or Won't? EVERYONE can hash it out. It is all a matter how stubborn you want to be. Divorce isn't moon light and roses, it is each person trying not to get screwed. You could have hashed it out if you gave your ex what he/she wanted, couldn't you? You can say you CAN NOT because you don't want to give it to demands but you CAN if you are willing to just be done with it so the attorney doesn't get thousands. I got techiniy screwed with both my divorces but I don't care. I may be bad at marriage but I am great at divorce. :-) Take it and go. Stuff and money can be replaced. Id rather see him get it and use if for our child than some law firm to buy another conference table on my dime.

Correction If your ex refuses to talk to you even after you tell him or her they can have what they want, there is nothing to be done but attorneys. I have seen that once personally and it is unbelievable that someone could hate that much that they were married to a person they refuse to ever talk to again. I guess it makes sense if it was a domestic abuse case so there are always exceptions. The point is the only one getting rich on all of us here are the lawyers.