my bf seems selfish when it comes to sex... I'm always down for sex therefore he gets it whenever he wants. I on the other hand am not so fortunate. Something that bothers me, that happened last night was we were in bed cuddling and I was massaging him down there. After I told him I had my period, he got mad and told me that I tease him when I can't even do it. Did he have the right to get mad? I understand he doesn't want to do it while I'm on my period but I like being close, intimate, giving massages... it doesn't have to lead to sex, does it? What is a constructive way of letting him know he is sounding like a selfish asshole when he gets mad like that? Or am I wrong?

I c.an see that Rubbing on the johnson could lead a guy to think he's going to get laid. OP - maybe if you tell him up front that it is that time of the month, but you still want to play, he won't be disappointed

Right, I can agree with what you wrote too If they're just kissing, being cuddly in bed, that doesn't always lead to sex. On the flip side I think if you're not going to finish the job in one way or another (by hand, orally or by intercourse), it's a little misleading to start rubbing a guy's junk. Yes, a woman should be able to say no at any time and that's her right, but I definitely think it's misleading to be "massaging down there" and then once he's aroused and ready to go, leave him hanging. It might be better if you know you aren't going to want to finish the job, not to start. Just stick to cuddling, etc.

I was just thinking that if the roles were reversed, I would be pretty damn disappointed myself. LOL

wow everybodyknowst that is WRONG once! I do not think one touches one's nether region just to fuck...comon... I touched it all the time because I love that area!!!hhahahhaha I hope the OPs b/f was joking if not time to tell him touching does not mean fucking in every case!

We'll have to agree to disagree on that one While I agree a woman has the right to say "stop" at any time, I think once you start rubbing a guy's "nether region" it's a little naive to be shocked when he gets an erection and is ready to go, particularly when you're in a committed relationship. If she doesn't want to be a tease, she should either help him finish by hand or not start rubbing his schlong to begin with. There are plenty of other places to massage (shoulders, back) that wouldn't be so misleading. Most human beings associate rubbing the penis with the imminent possibility of sex.

not in marriage!

You're not wrong You BF is confusing intimacy with sex. Many people think that cuddling, kissing & touching always leads to sex. Sad, because they are only getting half the enchilada. Intimacy is just as much fun in its own way & emotionally very satifying. Explain to him that sex is not always the end goal. A couple needs intimacy as much as sex & there IS a difference. It would be a shame to give up making out for a week just because of your period. Equate those times as long, drawn-out foreplay.

I agree here. I enjoy when my wife pays my body attention, even massaging my "hey now" softly, however it is a delicate balance, and for most couples i dont think its uncommon for a guy (or girl) to assume that its leading into sex. It sounds to me what threw him off was that you mentioned your period in there as if it was an excuse to not have sex. I for one am less opposed to having sex with Aunt Flow then my wife is.

It sounds to me that it was his decision not to have intercourse. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it sounds like you are ok with having intercourse during your period. So in fact you were not teasing him. You were enticing him and he decided that he didn't want intercourse during your period. Granted if you knew that, you could have told him before you started that you were having your period. Then he could decide if he wanted you to continue or not. Either way I'm with you, getting mad over this is immature. You could easily finish the job with your hand.

Please clarify if he decide not to paint it red, then it was his fault. If it was you that stopped, your fault. Sex is a two way street. and unless either you consider it a religious taboo, there is nothing wrong with a 'red wagon'.

my humble opinion I agree that, at least with my girlfriend, if I was massaging her down there, she would totally expect sex, either oral or intercourse, and would be very disappointed, and would maybe even leave, if I said I didn't want to do it. But I'm also not averse to giving oral, at least to the clitoris, during her period. I've also had intercourse and digital intercourse during periods before. It's just menstrual fluid afterall.

So he's not into riding the crimson tide Not the end of the world. Unless you get unnaturally horny during your time of month then this could be a potential problem. You did begin the post saying how unfortunate you are for this unwillingness of his... You could also chalk this up as a learning lesson. It's a mood killer for your boyfriend. Are you wrong? I dunno ..one thing you will want to remember with men, if you are going to rub their penis - better be prepared for something 'big'

I think you're in the wrong here It appears that you are saying that you were playing with his penis when sex wasn't an option. While it doesn't have to lead to sex you shouldn't play with his penis unless you intend to take him to orgasm by some means.