Confused! Help me! I posted an ad here on and received a reply from a female. Began conversing through e-mail. Graduated to 35 . We kinda lost touch with each other. We were able to reconnect and started to talk on a daily basis. We set up our first meeting. After the initial meeting, the conversing daily was through 35 and text. We ended up getting together again a couple weeks later. More daily 35 and text. While texting one late evening, she invited me over for the first time. I stayed the night (Nothing happened, just cuddling). Daily conversing continued. We began to have a sleepover or two a week for the next few weeks. During these sleepovers, we began to fool around but not all the way. A week came where she seemed to be real distant and not very talkative with me. Then came a night where we were supposed to have another sleepover but I never heard from her. We kinda had a little fight. I told her that I thought she wanted nothing to do with me and she responded with the whole "I think I just want to be friends" talk. At this point, I had developed some pretty strong feelings for her and wasn't sure if that is something that I could accept so I began to avoid her. Two days later I received an 35 message from her saying that she was feeling miserable and that she thought we should talk. I agreed and we ended up talking. She apologized for the way she had acted and said that she wanted to continue seeing each other because she wanted to see where this could go. I agreed. We got back to the sleepovers, more fooling around and this time going all the way. We went to a football game as planned. I wasn't myself that day and I guess I ignored her during the game and the stuff I did say was football related. Took her home and that was the first time that she didn't ask me to stay but said that we would get together the following night for a sleepover. The following night comes and I never heard from her. Well, I got the feeling that she didn't want me around and came up with the stupid idea of seeing if she was home. She was home and saw me drive by her house. That night she told me that she didn't want to pursue the relationship any further because of what happened at the game and the whole driving by deal, which I completely understand. I've tried to apologize for both nights and want to show her that what she saw those two nights isn't who I am but it's ...

Confused! Help me! continued... been three weeks and she hasn't spoken to me. I've tried and tried but get no response. I guess what confuses me is how something so good and so right can go up in flames just like that. Sorry for the rant, just needed to get it off my chest. Any thoughts?

Leave this one alone. Seriously. It doesn't matter why she made up her mind, but she's clearly done it.

She sounds incredibly immature. Move on. PS the drive by thing is creepy. Don't do that again.

I don't know.. you say something so good and so right but clearly it wasn't good and right at ALL since day one. No hidden signs necessary.. And driving by her house was creepy. I'm sorry. But I'd feel the same way as her. Your ENTIRE posts you make it seem like 'something was off' and you end it with ' was so good and so right'. You're missing the point here. IT wasn't good and right. You dated only, she took her chance and realized nothing was there. let it go

She seems to not know what she wants or wanted. Maybe she just wanted something not so serious. Maybe she wanted a relationship. Who cares? She's wishy-washy, you can do much better. You deserve to fall for somebody and have them fall back, not deny you or whatever the hell she is attempting to do. Move on.

Accept that you screwed up and move on Driving by the house was a bit creepy. If you ever feel so desperate that you would do that again, get some help. When someone doesnt you back you need to think that she was not a very good quality person if she didnt have the decency to break things off verbally. Feel good that you found that out now and move on.

they had multiple sleepovers, not just one date.

Sleepovers are not dates. That was my point.

yes and no. you can get to know a person a lot better during a sleepover than you can during the average date. and they didn't have sex during the first few sleepovers.

sleepovers.. are these things real? People have people they're not seriously dating sleep over? God, I'm gonna be single F O R E V E R... I'd NEVER!

We were dating

I agree I did think that it was more than I guess it turned out to be. That's the feeling I had and that's the feeling I was getting from her too.

Well... I'm certainly no expert when it comes to exactly what women think but from the little bit that I think I do know, I think a woman knows pretty quickly whether it's something that has potential or not. And some of it came directly from conversations that I had with her.

^^^Exactly!

I don't consider "sleeping over" (in and of itself) to be a date. It's just hanging out. Whether they had sex or not is irrelevant. It still isn't dating.

Problem is, your were too timid the whole time

There's no where to go from here. Respect her wishes and move on. Even if she did try & contact you again, how could you stand to be in such a turbulent relationship? Forget it, it's better this way.

Step x... Press the fucking enter key once in a while. So this woman cried about not getting enough attention at a fucking football game? Are you shitting me? You're better off with someone a little more mature.

I think I dated this girl once. Tell her I said hi and it's a shame she still can't seem to make up her mind. You're better off without her, man.

I feel for this girl dating is just that, dating. We're told not to exclude anyone, to know them first, to date and see where it leads.. Now this leads to no where and she's the asshole.. URGH.. I'm on her side.

How can you be? Just because she's a woman? If she were a man would you be on his side? How the hell do allow someone to sleep in your home with you and not it serious? She oviously has some problems. As for him driving past her house, its only creepy because he didn't come to the door. I remember when my husband and I were dating, he didn't or email for a few days so I drove to his house, I drove past it at first because I was nervous, finally I knocked on the door and his brother answered and told me he was in the hospital because he had a bad asthma attack, I went to the hospital to see him and the rest is history. Anywawy life is to short dwell on things, I say move becaause she already has and is probably back here on craplist now looking for another guy to ''cuddle'' with. P.S. DON't look for ltr with people online, it can end really badly. Most of the time anyway.

Sleeping over does not equal "serious", especially if there is no real dating going on. Basiy these two were just hanging out. She dropped him, end of story.

What a strange world we live in Having someone sleep over that you are interested in pursing a relation with IS serious! I mean they were cuddling, what the hell? You don't just talk with someone for weeks, probably telling them about your personal life, invite them into your HOME, not hotel room and let them sleep over. Letting him stay in her home overnight had to mean that she had some kind of feelings for him, or at least really trusted him. I don't know if your a man or a female, but a sane woman would NEVER let some guy she met online or anywhere else stay in her home with her overnight.

Confused She's not very mature or emotionally healthy. Give her space and time to think. In the meantime, go on with your life.

A-MEN Forum Fairy Dude...quit being such a goddamn pussy. Enjoy the fact you got some ass off the internet and move on. Text her and say, "Anytime you feel like doing something fun let me know, I'd love to show you a good time". Then delete her number. Done deal. The ball is her court and you have open ended ass. It doesn't look super desperate (like driving by her house in the middle of the night), and it give you at least a sense of being in control. Now move on and find a girl worth pursuing. The minute you forget about her, you'll find a text waiting for you in your inbox. Boo ya!