give her a time table On August 10 you will check yourself into a rehap After 30 when you come home you will.... anyway I think you see the point. if the timetable is not kept its splitsville. Take the and start a new life

Getting hit is the line for me. Once that happens I will pull out all the stops, and she will be on the street. But that's just me.

Group confrontation Have you tried a group in-your-face get-clean/sober or else confrontations?? There's a word for it but my brain is starving for caffein and sugar. Are you truely ready to put your foot down and say "This stops now" to her face? You can't get wishy-washy on something like that. Alcoholism is a disease that does not go away on its own. She has to want to clean up her act, you cannot do it for her. The only thing you can do is to make her chose between her life/children/family and drinking. After that you have to stop believing her words and believe only what her actions are telling you. Been there, done that. I've been sober 18+ years. Best of luck to you.

what's is funn is that is her favorite show. Intervention

ding ding ding so you are at least familiar with the process. Are you prepared for the outcome? Would you be able to walk out of there with out her? Time to start thinking about what you need to do to protect your family and yourself. As long as she is 'using her favorite drug of choice' she will have tunnel vision of only her needs and wants. Have any members of her family overcome the disease? Would any of them be willing to help you? What sort of resources in your town do you have?

we have... tried that. My family is fed up with her. And her family just wants her to come over to have beers. So they just fuel the fire. I guess after reading my own post I know the answer to this. I need to move on. Things will not change, they haven't for a while now. She actually has gotten much worse over the past 6 months. My biggest concern right now is my baby girl. If/when I file I would really like placement of her so that I know she is safe. I'm also concerned that I may have to pay some type of spousal support if she go's for county assistance as she really doesn't work much more than 3 days a week.

why cant you take your little girl and be her supporting parent. lots of dads are single parents. Its not always the mom that wins custody.

I plan on taking her... I have actually had her with me most of the time. I at least pick her up for few hours every day to make sure things are ok. The only other child in the house is my step-son whom I never was able to adopt as he does have a dad, not active, but around.

You will Most states you have to sustain her lifestyle for upto x years. So even if you get the you will still have to pay, or it might come out of CS, depends on your state laws. Sounds like divorce time. Defiently need the attorney.

That depends on the duration of the marriage, and the state.

Since they have only been married for two years, he probably won't pay any alimony.

Those are the things that get detailed out in court. You have to prove in court your belief that she is an unfit parent. Get copies of all the police reports and the arrest record.

Sounds terrible, sorry bro. Sounds like you're going to need an attorney. My biggest concern here is those . She's a drunk and you're gone for x weeks. What the hell is going through their heads? Not a good situation for them. So what was the lie? Can she prove anything?

the lie was back in may she noticed bruising on her legs. We were concerned that she had internal bleeding so we went to the doctors. They stated it was from thinning of the blood due to too much Ibuprofen and they gave her alternatives for her 'headaches' Which of course come from drinking too much. When I ed the police she told them the bruising was from me beating her? On her legs? When they came to place ME under arrest I showed them the prescription and told them to her doctor if they had questions...then I pulled out my phone and showed them the video from that night. Which was of her pushing me. I think this was funny to the police because I'm like x' x" xlbs, and she's x'x" maybe x. But anyway, the video showed it all

^^^best advice of the day

thanks for the input. I think I'll ditch before more of the angry folk arrive! I've been preparing, and have already made arrangements to have her removed from the property we rent. I then will re-sign the lease with only my name. I have a lawyer I've talked with, but wanted to hear some feedback from some un-bias people. Thanks for the input everyone.

You came on a good day. Sometimes it is worse. You should keep coming back. Let us know how things are progressing.

Moral of the story

No, it's don't trust an abuser.

coming from a recovering alcoholic.. She has to want to recover for *herself*. I she cant see everything else in her life hinges on that, I don't know what to say. There really is nothing to say to her. If she isn't ready to stop, for herself, then just get out of the way and let her reap the bad consequences of her actions. Don't try to help, cushion, or anything else. Maybe she will hit bottom and want to recover, maybe she'll get locked up with a wet brain, maybe she'll die. Not your .