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Pages: sounds a bit childish to me... [1]
Author Topic: Sounds a bit childish to me...
Holly-anne

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2011-02-14 0-53-33-

sounds a bit childish to me... ...at wiz' house Aunt Flo is in town for a few days. She's an evil bitch and the SO was laid up most of the day yesterday. She doesn't like me to rub her tummy or her back during that time - she just wants to be left alone, so I try and be as understanding as I can - offer sympathy, fix dinner and stuff like that. But - SO doesn't think I should be out of commission just because she is, so normally sometime during the visit when she feels better she'll start *something* so that I can have a happy ending. She's pretty great that way ;-) I don't get why hubby would have a problem either. It does sound a little childish to me - just because Mr. Happy's not cooperating doesn't mean the girl shouldn't get some satisfaction out of the encounter. I think maybe communicating would be good - I wonder if trying to bring yourself some relief didn't bring him a bit of humiliation - kinda like "you can't do it so I'm gonna take care of myself". I know it's irrational but it's the only thing I can think of, unless the guy's just a selfish bastid ;-) You could ask for an alternative, RtR. If he's got a problem there maybe some more communication is in order - but there's a mindset here that needs to change a little, I think. If I'd pulled something like that the SO probably would have applied a frying pan to the side of my head - but if both of you can't have a happy ending it's my opinion that both of you should work toward at least one of you having one ;-)
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dedic

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2011-02-16 0-41-03-

Dunno?? but here goes. I am assuming he is a relatively young man. If this is the case, not being able to maintain an erecting is a very, very serious blow to a man’s ego. When he fails, his feelings become clouded with displaced aggression and anger. He may even direct some or all of this at you for his problems. EVEN-EVEN at worst case if he was cheating, most men recover sexually after and hour and are ready again, so I kinda ruled this out. You might try one other approach. During sex, let each person take responsibility for their own sexual satisfaction and completion. This takes the pressure of performance off the other person. If all else fails, you and he might make a trip to the doc. If it's psychological maybe it can be discovered if it is physical maybe it can be fixed. Good luck..
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bottino

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2011-02-20 14-54-35

ask him to please you other ways don't just lie there waiting for fifteen minutes for him to come up with an alternative, then reach for your solo solution. tell him you want his fingers or his tongue or his participation with the vibrator, so he doesn't have to feel shut out from the process. I agree that he should be offering alternatives without prompting, but some men are clueless that way till taught. if he continues clueless or reluctant after requests, but still gets upset when you take matters into your own hands, you need to find someone less cock-centered and selfish in bed.
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bundschuh

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2011-02-24 18-18-29

Let yo fingers do the walking... I am very thankful that my boyfriend plays Bass = strong fingers :)
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corless

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2011-03-02 17-03-07

Hmmmm..... I generally have pretty good luck with the fingers, but I never associated it with my bass playing before. Interesting....so women that are really into oral should date trumpet players, maybe?
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berndt

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2011-03-08 9-21-04-

My dad is a trumpet player No wonder my mom has been blissfully happy for over 30 years.
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eifert

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2011-03-16 23-28-36

yeah but... once you go bass you never go back ;)
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morello

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2011-03-23 16-05-29

I was with a drummer once he had a great rhythm. He really did. So I can believe that musical abilities translate well to sexual abilities. Never had a bassist though.
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craft

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2011-03-25 6-25-04-

I *was* a drummer once, for many years but apartment living can really cut into one's ability to practice. That, and I got sick of lugging the most crap on and off stage.
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doorn

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2011-03-25 6-25-04-

I mostly like teachers & writers, & vice versa so I haven't had a chance to test-drive a musician. bummer!
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Cuthbert

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2011-03-27 2-32-49-

i also play bass, clemmy ;-) show these pics to the bf. ;-)
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henman

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2011-03-27 4-14-56-

HOLY SHIT I have a gorilla playing bongos sitting on my dresser...that is weird.
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bastin

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2011-04-02 12-02-02

great minds think alike ;-)
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harbinson

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2011-04-09 11-30-59

That is AWESOME! I bought him a DJ Lakland - it's hiding in my moms closet...He's getting it for Christmas. Also bought him a Signature Steve Harris Fender Last Christmas he got a Sadowsky. Bass players rock!
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shifrin

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2011-04-13 23-42-59

the one in the pic is a genuwyne US Lakland... ...although I do love the DJ models too. You bought him a Sadowsky? Will you marry me? ;-)
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pinkelman

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2011-04-15 2-41-32-

damn. damn, damn, damn ;-) What a great present. I prefer Lakland to Sadowsky but they're both so good I think it boils down to personal preference. I've corresponded with Roger once or twice - he's a great guy. I have some pictures on ebassist's site of me touring the Lakland factory back in x. Since I can be identified in the pictures I won't post the link here, but if you wanna drop me an email I'll send you the link ;-)
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carbonara

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2011-04-22 15-46-50

very cool! I'd love to see 'em!
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bloomquist

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2011-04-28 23-36-54

btw, the SO gave me a hard time... ...when I told her that I asked you to marry me. Think I'm gonna have to renege on that offer ;-)
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Gillan

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2011-04-29 5-00-52-

No offense taken - And trust me...I hog the pillow - you are much better off! A hint to your SO - my buying him that bass got me a lot of great nookie...it was worth every penny!
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faris

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2011-05-09 11-35-37

is that a rickenbocker ?? excuse my spelling...
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carbine

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2011-05-13 21-45-27

nah - vintage ibanez... ...which is one of the reasons I own it. The other is that it'll out-thump a p-bass ;-)
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Alis

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2011-06-05 1-47-49-

Nice - I really like it. Got outbid on a sunburst like that on Ebay...that got my panties in a wad.
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mincher

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2011-06-28 3-24-23-

Heh, thought it was a Danelectro.
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Rianon

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2011-07-10 1-47-06-

also, i run a forum for bass players... But I'd really rather not know if anyone from here (or their SO) posts over there. If clemmy's bf or switch would like to participate they're welcome, but I'd really prefer not to know if someone signed up from here.
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Shaw

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2011-07-24 3-34-50-

I only use this handle on CL, wiz; if I check out your bass 'fo, there will be no bleed-over. You would never know I was there, unless you somehow recognized my melodious prose, which I find highly unlikely.
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kagel

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2011-07-30 8-32-07-

gotcha ;)
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Hendrik

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2011-07-31 3-35-33-

because He felt like you were rubbing his face in his own inability to please you? That you were mocking his physical problem by basiy saying, "That's okay, I didn't need you for this anyway." ?? You think? Couldn't you have waited till the poor guy was asleep or gone discreetly into the next room?
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koski

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2011-08-12 5-51-53-

you're right I guess I was frustrated with him giving up so I didn't think about his feelings when took matters into my own hands. I was being a little immature I suppose. Maybe I should have gone in the other room.
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boney

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2011-09-04 2-23-45-

He probably took it that way, but he should have offered to help out in the first place. I'd be bitter if my DW started getting into it with me, decided she simply wasn't turned on enough and backed out - and then got mad because I took matters into my own hands. Point is, he wasn't "unable"; he was unwilling, which is very different. An erection was not necessary, except maybe for him to get off. Besides, one would think that maybe by taking care of things yourself with him there, he would have gotten more turned on, not gotten angry. Again, he really needs to talk to a shrink and/or MD about this.
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