I know I shouldn't be asking in here but The other forms everyone is - & + each other and this one looks like I could get real feed back. Well, here I go. I am in a 2 year relationship with my boyfriend mark. On my brothers birthday on July 7th I saw a guy that I have liked for years. I haven't been able to get him out of my head. Mark and I have been very stressed out recently. I just started a home business and he is working for his parents right now because he is out of work for his union. I am paying all the bill but his half of the rent. He tells me 2 weeks ago he is very stressed and unhappy. he says he thinks he lost that spark in us. I am doing everything in my power to make mark happy. He has seen that and it makes him happy seeing how much I love him. Now going back to the guy I saw. I haven't ed him or tried to get a hold of him at all. I have told mark I would like to see this guy and talk to him because I was just as good of friends with him as I was with the other guy. mark understands and says this is ok. I feel bad because I do love mark and we were best friends for 7 years before dating but I just can't stop dreaming about this other guy and hoping to run into him again. I have his number but am too nervous to . I don't know I know this doesn't make very much since. Any opinion would be great though. Thank you!

So Mark says he's lost his Spark. And you've got a spark for someone else. Sounds like perfect timing to me.

Firsty of all How old are you and your boyfriend? Is he your first long-term boyfriend? Did you ask him what he meant when he said he felt like he lost that spark? He might just be tired or feeling bad about not working and pulling his weight. You could be jeopardizing your relationship by contacting this guy. I think you have to decide if you want the current relationship to work before you this other guy. You and your bf need to have an honest talk about where you expect the two of you to go.

n this is not my longest I have been in 2 others. first was 2 years the second for 4 1/2 years. I am 22 and he is 28. he and I have been friends for over 7 years. He said that he doesn't know what is wrong. he doesn't like my work. (I run a daycare out of our house.) He knows I can only make this good of money doing this job. He wants me to stop doing it and go back to making 19,000-24,000 a year like he does. ok he didn't say that but he wants me to go back to my other job and thats not good enough money. I am now in the 55,000-60,000 a year. he has known for the past 2 year we have been together that i was going to do this. He was happy and I had all his support until i got it off that ground and am making good money. he has known since i was younger and before we started dating I had a goal to buy a house by the time I'm 25 and I really see the end of the tunnel and he wants me to stop. My last bf held me back and I was with him 4 years and tried everything to make it work too find out nothing would ever change and I moved on 2 year too late. I don't want this to be the same thing and thats why I'm asking for any advise.

thats a scary thought but If I'm having feelings for someone else I need too. I don't even know if they are feelings because I haven't even talked to him in 3 years before this past july 7th. I don't want to give up on something that just needs work to find out what these feelings are if they even are even feelings. on the other hand I don't want to stay in a relationship if its not going to work. I don't want to loose time in my life for something that might get worse m just all over the place.

he doesn't sound like the right one. Geez, in this economy you've found a way to make a decent living, you're 22 and it seems ike you ought to be able to buy your own house soon, this is Super. You've got a lot going for you for sure. The right person will support this, be thrilled about it, not threatened by it. Or indifferent. The best objective advice could give would be to end things with Mark and DON'T (hard part) the other guy until you'e been single for awhile and maybe even bought a house on your own. Accomplishing things while you're single makes you better partner material. bias - I think owning a home is an important thing in life especially for single women.) Get the house, then see where you are with men.

i understand that but its really not that easy

Make or break Decide if you want to stay with Mark or not before pursuing this new guy. Make a clean break with Mark if you don't want to be with him. To me it sounds like you want Mark around just in case things don't work out between you and the new guy you're interested in. Instead of keeping Mark around as your safety monkey, just break up with him and pursue this new guy. Or stay with Mark and choose not to pursue this other guy. Keeping Mark around waiting in the wings for you to decide isn't fair.

Didn't you just lie to your BF? or did you honestly tell him you've "liked" this other guy for years, that you're "dreaming" about him, "can't get him out of your head," and that you're "hoping to run into him?" NO, all you told him was that you were good "friends." So no, his answer that it's OK isn't real - and your pursuit of this other guy could be perceived as cheating. You need to come clean with Mark with the TRUTH. Otherwise, make a choice: Stay with Mark, work on getting through this tough spot, and forget the other guy; or break up with Mark *before* you start pursuing the other guy.